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~The Diary of An Unrepentant Cat Lady~

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28th October 2013

10:29pm: Right now I am controlling the shit out of the things I can control. And there aren't many of them.

9th August 2013

11:10pm: It's shitty when you realize that you wasted 2.5 years studying something about which you now give zero fucks. Islamic studies. Who cares? Not me. What was I thinking? Past Andréa was a fucking idiot.
GIVE.ME.THE.MONEY.

8th May 2013

8:56pm: I dream about not needing other people. It's my fantasy. I wish I could be alone all the time. It would be so much easier and more pleasant. Tonight was miserable. Tomorrow won't be great for a number of reasons. It's kind of exhausting.
7:36pm: ..........
Rage is irritating.

22nd April 2013

8:08pm: Note to self
Mise à jour: Barring an incredibly enthusiastic request on the part of the other person to spend time with me, I'm definitely letting this one die. Not worth it. Not nearly reciprocal enough. Sigh.


Be yourself with your Squab and your Squab alone because apparently your ideas are too scandalous and probably fascist for civilized people.

Above all, stop getting attached. This leads to bad things happening.

The question is though, do I bother trying to save this friendship? Squab, being Squab, and needing people almost as much as he needs salmonella, would say no. And I am inclined to agree. But still, as a woman, it gets drilled into your pretty little head that you need people to like you, even though whether they do or not makes not one bit of difference. It's a conundrum.

21st April 2013

1:20pm: Knowing that this exists was the greatest gift that I could ask for!

18th April 2013

10:58am: Mise à jour: I realize how incredibly self-centered this sounds. What I was trying to express is that I am profoundly disturbed that I (or anyone) could lose someone that I love because someone else decided that he hates America/Boston/runners/fertilizer etc. I have trouble accepting human frailty and its omnipresence.

I have two close friends who live in Boston, one of whom lived with the Squab and me for several months. She was about to leave to go the finish line when the bombs went off. My brother, his longtime girlfriend and my closest childhood friend and her family live in Texas. My friend lives in Austin which is two hours' drive from where the explosion took place. I am having serious trouble keeping it together this morning.

28th February 2013

10:21pm: I'm a little out of control, have to get backing to watching what I eat. I feel sluggish and out of energy.
Who else thinks that the pope will soon announce his intention to become a Wal-Mart greeter!

Peace out!

6th January 2013

9:52am: Photobucket

29th December 2012

8:29pm: Holidays
With the family the holidays were relaxing. Back in reality, well, not so relaxing. One more horrid semester and then I'm done. I ate like some kind of turbo-swine but at least there was a constant exercise. I went skiing today and managed to hurt my arm. It hurts to bend my wrist now. That was fun. What is it like not to be horrifically clumsy? But the holidays were fun. I was impressed at how charming the Squab was. And my Mom and Dad. My God, talk about relationship role models. They still seem in love. Even if they talk about their sex life sometimes. Which is frightening. And ultimately reassuring.

Ok, so Bridezillas is now on netflix and of course I've been watching it because I love it and it makes me feel like someone with priorities. But now I am planning my not-wedding. Here is a list of reasons why marriage is a bad idea for people like us:

- Neither of us especially likes being the center of attention for an extended period of time.
- Anyone outside of my immediate family makes Squab really uneasy. Or at least, my Mom's family.
- Bridal dresses are usually strapless or have tiny straps. My farms can't do strapless/tiny straps. I've seen pictures.
- I want to travel and have savings and if it's ever feasible, own a house. Wedding money could go towards one or more of these things.
- Squab genuinely believes that marriage is a religious-bullshit holdover thing.
- Our famillies have, um, differing philosophies as to what constitutes an appropriate gathering.
- Neither of us especially likes toasts.


And yet I'm looking at inns in Outaouais! What is wrong with me.

1st November 2012

10:32am: I have decided to dress up as the internet for this weekend's Halloween party.
So there!

9th October 2012

4:16pm: The American Ivy League can officially suck on my left one.
1:23am: Fuck me I am a lost cause.

4th October 2012

10:23pm: Eating rather like a walrus lately.
Not as bad as it could be, but jesus. Also sleeping like a sloth. For chrissakes woman, pull it together.

20th September 2012

8:17am: I have gained 4 pounds since beginning p90x. According to this website this is normal. But Jesus.

12th September 2012

10:33pm: p90x is still punishing me. In fact, I think that doing the plyometrics routine should be used in lieu of fines to punish people for minor offensives (parking tickets, crossing against the light and the like). If people knew that was in store for them, no one would ever again fail to read the parking signs. What else? Oh, school is still filling me with a nausea-inducing fear. Every time the bile comes up, I try to suppress it with productivity. This a new tactic for me. I'll keep you posted. I became the treasurer of a club and I don`t even know how. I just sat there and let it happen to me. Also, cats.

4th September 2012

10:23pm: What's up with me?
Well, school starts tomorrow, which I am dreading. At least I don`t have any classes tomorrow. I'm doing the p90x exercise plan and not eating garbage food but also not doing the p90x diet because I don't see the point of that much effort. Since people always say the childfree only care about their appearance or other such superficial things that no parent would ever care about, ever, I have decided to embrace the stereotype and get super fit and sexy. When I`m rolling in disposable income, I'll post a copy of my bank statement.
Other than dreading school, I have nothing to report. Except that the cats are adorable.

26th June 2012

10:59pm: So is Jezebel being weird to anyone else? For all the articles on the site, it says that all discussions are closed. Did something happen that I don't know about because I am not cool?

16th June 2012

9:10am: Photobucket

3rd June 2012

12:32am: It has come to my attention that I haven't updated this thing in a while. I hope that no one takes this personally. I have very little that's new to add and I'm sure that you all don't wish to hear the nonsense shit over and over again.

I just want this degree to be done so I can get a job. I am sick of school and sick of having no money. Some words of advice? Unless you are prepared to become a professor, do not pass go, do not collect 200$, go straight for the money. You can always take the fun books out of the library.

I plan to leave Montréal and move to the country. I'm sick of people here, and their bs.
Anyways.

20th April 2012

3:27am: Profundity
Turning thirty is really not a big deal. It's been three hours and I still don't need clothespins to hold my face in place. I would, however, REALLY love to get some sleep.
Bags under my eyes will probably make me look older...

25th February 2012

11:06am: Jesus Christ. I feel like I have totally ruined my life. It is going nowhere and never will.
I really should've waited another year and gone to Université de Montréal. I'm fucked and it's all my fault.

23rd December 2011

11:46pm: For anyone who still reads this thing: I was laid-off, again. Not fired for any kind of sexual harassment but still laid. Have no money coming in. Again. JFC.

7th November 2011

1:05am: You are not an hippopotamus
Don't wallow. Don't wallow. Don't wallow.

24th September 2011

1:02pm: VAGINAS!
Now that I have your attention, nobody liked the picture of the kitty who ate pills? No one? Jeez, this is a tough crowd.

The video that can be seen through this link is interesting, and by interesting I mean bizarrely fascinating and mildly depressing. It's about the representation of vulvas(shitty phrasing but I don't know how else to say it) that can be shown in Australian softcore magazines and how the portrayal of the "neat and tidy" vag* may be leading to an increase in elective labiaoplasty surgeries. The interviews and research were conducted by Hungry Beast, a now-cancelled Australian news show. I found it through the Jezebel website.


Vag-o-matic and so very, very NSFWCollapse )


* I am aware that what is being shown is actually called a vulva but like the producers of this segment, I too enjoy saying vagina.
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